Emotional Harmony through Therapy for Empaths: Helpful DBT Tools
One of the biggest strengths of an empath is their innate sense of empathy. Empaths can connect with people and animals beyond an ordinary level. They often feel the feelings of those around them as if they were their own. Their ability to understand the emotions of others, sometimes without words, is unmatched. Typically, empaths feel drawn to helping others and enjoy being able to support people. The emotional sensitivity of empaths and highly sensitive people is a gift. At the same time, it can create challenges such as difficulty with boundaries, absorbing other people’s emotions, and lack of self-care. In our fourth blog in the DBT series, we, here at Embodied Wellness, PLLC, dive into how DBT tools can be tailored toward therapy for empaths.
What is an Empath?
Being an empath is a personality trait or characteristic, not a clinical diagnosis. Empaths have the unique ability to connect with others. They are often highly sensitive people who can pick up on the emotional states of those around them. Empaths are deeply empathetic and have a heightened ability to understand what others are thinking and feeling. There are some common characteristics of empaths. These include being highly sensitive, intuitive, and deeply compassionate. Empaths may struggle with absorbing the emotions of those around them, setting boundaries, and negative energy in their environment can drain them.
What is DBT?
Dialectical Behavior Therapy is a structured and evidence-based approach developed by Dr. Marsha Linehan. It provides tools and strategies for empaths to help them manage their sensitivity and emotional responses. DBT can help empaths maintain emotional balance and build healthier relationships. It equips them with practical skills to thrive in a world where sensitivity can be both a gift and a challenge. DBT is organized into four modules- emotion regulation, mindfulness, distress tolerance, and interpersonal effectiveness.
Mindfulness for Empaths
DBT mindfulness skills can be helpful for empaths. Since they often experience heightened emotional sensitivity. They also have the tendency to feel the emotions of others. Mindfulness skills can empower empaths to embrace their sensitivity as a gift rather than a burden. By gaining greater awareness, empaths can navigate their empathic abilities better. While maintaining their emotional well-being in the process.
Examples of DBT Mindfulness Skills:
One-Mindfully:
Empaths can benefit from focusing on one thing at a time, especially when connecting with others. Empaths are frequently overwhelmed by sensory input so by giving their full attention to the person they are with, they are less overwhelmed.
Effectively:
DBT mindfulness skills teach empaths to make decisions that align with their values and long-term goals. For example, they can learn how to set boundaries while still offering support and empathy.
Loving-Kindness Meditation:
Loving-kindness meditations by Jon Kabat-Zinn can help empaths be more compassionate and empathetic to themselves and others. These meditations also help highly sensitive people maintain balance and reduce emotional exhaustion.
Emotion Regulation for Empaths
Emotion regulation skills are helpful for empaths when they experience intense emotions. By applying these techniques, empaths can feel more in control over their emotional responses rather than controlled by them. They also are better able to navigate social interactions because their emotions are in check.
Examples of DBT Emotion Regulation Skills:
Reducing Vulnerability to Negative Emotions: It can be helpful for empaths to identify people, places, and things that make them more vulnerable to emotional overload. This might be large social gatherings or stressful environments. If we don’t know what triggers us, it’s hard to know when to use coping skills.
Problem-Solving: When empaths become overwhelmed by other people’s emotions, they can use problem-solving skills. This may involve setting boundaries or seeking support from a therapist for empaths.
Acceptance of Emotions: It is common for empaths (and pretty much all humans) to invalidate emotions that they do not like. When highly sensitive people accept and are compassionate towards their emotions, even if they do not like them, they feel better and less overwhelmed by them.
Interpersonal Effectiveness for Empaths
Empaths can use interpersonal effectiveness skills to help them maintain healthy boundaries, and enhance their general well-being. Empaths have a hard time balancing their own emotional needs and the needs of others. By applying DBT tools, empaths can reduce emotional exhaustion and improve their relationships. One important thing for empaths to remember is that taking care of yourself and setting boundaries is not selfish. It is actually the responsible and necessary way of living a healthy and fulfilling life for yourself and others.
Examples of DBT Interpersonal Effectiveness Skills:
FAST: This acronym helps empaths improve how they communicate with others and negotiate their needs effectively.
Fair: Begin by being both fair and reasonable when you are asking for what you want.
No Apologizes: Sometimes empaths apologize even when something is not their fault. You do not have to apologize for asking for what you want or need. If you apologize, it sends the message that you believe you have done something wrong. Asserting yourself and asking for your needs to be met is not wrong. Only apologize if you have done something wrong!
Stick to your values: Identify your morals and values and stick to them! It can be easy to stray from your values (such as to be respected at work) in order to avoid feeling uncomfortable.
Truthful: Be honest and tell the truth. It’s easy to "stretch the truth” or tell white lies in order to get what you want. By telling the truth, you will build trust with the other person and increase the chances they will do what you want them to do!
Distress Tolerance Skills for Empaths
Distress tolerance techniques are great for empaths because they can reduce overwhelming feelings. Empaths can struggle with absorbing other people’s emotions and these skills can reduce the negative impact of this. The goal of distress tolerance skills is not to completely drop feelings. They allow empaths to better tolerate the thoughts and emotions they experience.
Examples of DBT Distress Tolerance Skills:
ACCEPTS Skills:
This acronym stands for Activities, Contributing, Comparisons, Emotions, Push Away, Thoughts, and Sensations. The goal is to help you tolerate your emotions until you are able to resolve the problem in your life.
Activities:
Participate in a healthy, pleasant activity! The ideas are endless. Go for a walk in the Ann Arbor Arb, call a friend you haven’t talked to in a while, watch the Michigan Wolverines (Go Blue!) or MSU Spartans (Go Green), bake brownies, play with your pet or take a nap. Once you finish one activity, try another. The goal is to distract yourself!
Contributing:
Help someone out! Doing something kind for someone else can take our minds off of our problems and make us feel good about ourselves. You can rake your neighbor’s leaves, check in on your grandparents, volunteer for a hotline, or bake cookies for a friend.
Comparisons:
Sometimes it can be helpful to put our lives into perspective. Typically we tend to compare ourselves to people who have it “better” than us but have you ever thought of people who have experienced more difficult challenges than you? We don’t do this to add more stress and pain to our situation but rather to add a different perspective to what we are experiencing.
Emotions:
It can feel like our emotions are out of our control. There are rules about emotions, though! Feelings fade over time unless re-stimulated. You can stimulate feelings in different ways. For example, if you search on Instagram “cute kittens,” a smile will probably emerge on your face. If you meditate for 15 minutes, you will probably feel less anxious. If you watch a funny comedian on Netflix, you will feel less depressed.
Push Away:
Sometimes things are just hard to deal with in the present moment. In these situations, you can use the “push away” technique where you push them out of your mind temporarily. You can distract yourself in different ways through activities or mindfulness techniques such as loving-kindness meditation. Eventually, you will have to return to the issue but not right now.
Thoughts:
Use your mind as a distraction! Here are examples of a few ways to distract your mind:
Name foods that start with the letters A, B, C, etc.
Do a crossword puzzle, sudoku, or word game on your phone
Say the alphabet backward
Sensation:
You can utilize your five senses (touch, smell, taste, sight, and hearing) to soothe yourself when feeling stressed. Wrap yourself in a cozy blanket, light a candle, eat a yummy snack, watch something beautiful in nature, or listen to relaxing music. Get creative and explore different ways to engage your senses!
Use DBT Tools through Therapy for Empaths in Detroit, Ann Arbor, and throughout Michigan
Empaths, if you've been feeling overwhelmed by the intense emotions and sensitivities that come with your gift, know that help is within your reach. DBT tools are here to provide you with practical skills to manage your emotions, set boundaries, and find the balance you need. It's time to take control of your empathic abilities and lead a more balanced, fulfilling life. Reach out to a therapist who specializes in therapy for empaths in Michigan. Together, you can explore DBT tools and techniques that will empower you to navigate the world as an empath with strength and resilience. Your journey to emotional well-being starts today. Follow the steps below to get started with Embodied Wellness, PLLC:
Reach out to schedule a free consultation.
Speak with a compassionate therapist for empaths.
Start your journey to a more fulfilling life.
Other Therapy Services Offered at Embodied Wellness in Detroit, Ann Arbor, and throughout Michigan
Our compassionate and understanding therapists for empaths offer various services and specialties outside of empath therapy. This includes depression treatment, Trauma therapy and PTSD treatment, Somatic therapy, and DBT. We also offer EMDR therapy and Internal Family Systems. All these online therapy services are available for both teenagers and adults. Nosotros tambien ofrecemos terapia en español en Detroit y otras partes de Michigan. Take the first step to a better tomorrow and visit our Detroit-based practice today!
Other Blogs in the DBT Blog Series
About the Author:
Sarah Rollins, LMSW, SEP is the founder of Embodied Wellness, PLLC, a group therapy practice providing online therapy in Michigan. She is passionate about expanding awareness of somatic therapy as a way to treat and heal trauma. She incorporates other holistic treatments into her practice including EMDR and IFS.